dumb kid

Dumb Kid

Have you ever felt like a dumb kid before?

Quarantine has given me the opportunity to reconnect with many people I would otherwise never see again. Family members, pets, childhood friends living 10,000 miles away.

It amazes me how during our lifetimes we are so close to some people, and all of a sudden we become complete strangers.

Some people vanish from our lives to never be seen again (a blessing?) while we keep bumping into others from time to time (oh no)…

And then we reconnect.

I just bumped into one of them, my best friend as a teen, during an Instagram search.

I don’t even remember what I was looking for but probably I typed words like instagram marketing, photography, etc.

And there she appeared. Like coming back from a time travel trip.

We started to talk and memories flowed like a river.

We loved McDonald’s and still can recite the Big Mac ingredients backwards (very 80’s). I think even as I get older and my brain starts to deteriorate I will still remember those ingredients.

We recalled songs, favorite shows, an olive lost in my parents fancy carpet that was so well hidden that it is still there today. The pasta we threw on the ceiling, scary friends that we still fear today, 40 years later.

I don’t think I have a great memory, stress takes its toll. But there are some situations, some words, some scenes that just stayed with me forever.

Brazil. 7th grade. 

All the girls back then had these notebooks where their friends would answer friendship questions. What is your favorite food? What is your favorite TV show? What is your favorite color? Which boy do you have a crush on… Everything to get to the most important question: What do you think about me? 

It is a million dollar question that I think haunts every teenager from all generations.

We all want to be liked, to be cool, to feel loved.

She filled it out and I held my breath. 

And there it was, my best friend’s answers in my brand new friendship notebook. We liked the same things, the same music…everything was going great until I read the very last one. The one that would define my mood for the rest of the day.

She was honest. Brutally so, unfortunately.

“I think you are fun, a good friend, but a little show-off and a DUMB KID.”

She had just returned from a year living abroad in the U.S., and obviously was showing off her English. I had no idea what a “dumb kid” was, and there was no Google at that time.

I ran to the dictionary. 

Kid: “a child or young person” and then DUMB: “stupid; temporarily unable or unwilling to speak.”

Really? Me?

Oh man. That ruined my day. Even my best friend thought I was stupid.

I am not sure why she wrote that, but knowing her sense of humor she was probably joking around and picking on me.

Looking back, we laughed too hard at that story. She didn’t even remember! The conversation ran as if we had seen each other this whole time.

I think true friendships are forever, no matter the distance or time between. I let her off the hook for the “dumb kid” comment. Not just because I know it was a joke, but also because I value my friendships. 

In pandemic times, when we feel so isolated and hopeless, to reconnect with old friends may bring some light and hope for the future.

This “dumb kid” and her friend picked right back up where we left off.